Dr. John Tamilio III
© 2022, Dr. Tamilio
I was ordained on June 6, 1999.
I began serving my first church and Wakefield, New Hampshire one month later.
Between these two moments of great joy and anticipation, I attended the annual meeting of the New Hampshire Conference of the United Church of Christ. One of the first people I met was the Rev. Dr. Jack Lynes — one of the state’s three Conference Ministers. Jack, who was such a brilliant and jubilant man, looked at me, smiled, and said, “You know what they say about parish ministry?”
“What’s that?” I asked.
Jack said, “During your first two years, you cannot do anything wrong. During your next two years, you can’t do anything right. During your last three years, you get something done.”
FOOTNOTE: this was at a time when pastors typically stayed in a church for seven years. Today, it’s less than that. Most clergy last about two-to-three years in a parish. It is as if professional ministry is now perpetual interim ministry.
Today marks my ten-year anniversary as your pastor.
- I’ve done some things right.
- I’ve done some things wrong.
- And I think it is fair to say that I’ve gotten some things done.
That said — I feel as if I am just getting started and am looking forward with joy to the decade that is before us.
I spent this summer reflecting at length on my spirituality. I have always possessed a deep faith in Jesus Christ, but have felt my spirit getting a bit dry lately. I knew I had to do some spiritual self-care in order to be the best pastor I can be.
You may have heard this illustration before — when you are on a plane getting ready to take off, the flight attendant says, “In the unlikely event that the cabin loses air pressure, a mask will come down in front of you.” AFTER that they tell you how to put on said mask. They say, “If you are traveling with someone who needs assistance, put your mask on BEFORE helping the other person.” Why? If you do not take care of yourself first, you will be of no use to your fellow traveler. Let me repeat that: if you do not take care of yourself first, you will be of no use to your fellow traveler.
I realized that as a pastor, I need to take care of my own spirituality before I can help all of you with your own spiritual growth and health.
I spent a great deal of time this summer scouring the Scriptures, and I read a variety of prayer books. I quickly realized that my prayer life needed attention.
You can never pray enough. We all know that. As the Apostle Paul said, we are to “pray without ceasing” (1 Thess. 5:17). Praying is one thing. How we pray and what we pray is something to reflect upon at a deeper theological level.
No, I am not saying that prayer needs to include just the right words. As the Bible also tells us, prayer can be comprised of sighs and groans. That said, prayer is not just about the head. It is about connecting the heart and the mind to feed the soul. Let me repeat that as well: it is about connecting the heart and the mind to feed the soul.
As I take stock of our last ten years together and look toward the next ten years (you might not want me around for another ten years, but that’s a sermon for another time), as I look forward to our future together, I realize that my primary goal is to help you (all of you) grow spiritually.
Here is the question for all of us to ponder: where is God? I am not speaking in a literal or physical sense. This is more metaphysical, you could say. Whenever you do anything — be it work or play, be it a family obligation or an extracurricular hobby — whenever you do anything (the jubilant, the dreary, or anything in between), stop and ask yourself, “Where is God in the midst of this? What is God trying to teach or reveal to me right now?”
People want to separate their lives into the sacred and the secular. For example, many think of what they do at church as part of the sacred, whereas what they do elsewhere (at work, for example) is part of the secular.
The truth is that there is no division between the two. Everything and every moment is part of the sacred. Think of a moment: when are you NOT a Christian? When are you NOT a child of God? When is God NOT with you?
I often find myself perusing the pages of Matthew when I read the Gospels. Maybe it’s because I took a course on this Gospel in seminary. Maybe it’s because the musical Godspell — which I love and for which I did the music over three decades ago — Godspell is based on Matthew’s account of Jesus’ life. Whatever the reason, this is my go-to when I ponder the person and work of Jesus. That text ends with the Great Commission: Jesus sending the remaining eleven disciples out to teach the Gospel and baptize the nations in the name of the Trinity. Before he sends them off, though, he offers these words — the final verse in Matthew: “surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age” (28:20).
Jesus is with us always — no matter where we go or what we do. If that is true, then indeed every moment is sacred. There is no secular in the life of the Christian. Everything we do and say should be for the glory of God and to spread the Gospel of Jesus Christ.
I will also be with you. As your spiritual leader, I will continue to preach and teach a message that is biblically-based and Christ-centered to equip you for this good work. I will also focus on your spiritual development so that you may grow into the fullness of Christ. This is central to the Apostle Paul’s own teaching.
This is a journey that is never complete. In fact, the point of the journey of spiritual formation is the journey itself. It is a journey that has many twists and turns, highs and lows, ups and downs, peaks and valleys…fill in the blank with your favorite cliché. However, the spiritual growth that results from the journey is anything but cliché. It is foundational to our lives as Christians. It is central to our lives as human beings.
So, let’s make a goal for ourselves for at least this new, program year. It is Rally Day, after all, so let’s rally! Let’s make it a goal for us all to deepen our spiritual wells this year, allowing God to transform us into the disciples he would have us be.